change | Springwolf Reflections

Jonathon Boots

Letting Go and Letting the Divine Carry The Burden

“You can’t change the past. You can only change the way you allow the past to affect your present and your future.” ~ Springwolf

What ever the situation, making change to deal with the trials of life, or letting go of the past is not easy. No matter what the situation or what the loss, be it the death of a loved one (animal or human), the loss of a friendship or love relationship, the loss of innocence, allowing drugs or alcohol to control your path or a hurt that has been felt and carried for a long time; our psyche goes through a period of mourning.

In today’s world the line between Psychology, Therapy and Spirituality is growing thinner. Working on the issues in one’s life doesn’t mean throwing out your beliefs, nor does it mean your personal views and spiritual practices will be under scrutiny. Rather there is a growing movement to understand how both the mainstream concepts of therapy can be supported, expanded and enhanced by the spiritual beliefs of an individual. . After all, when more than 80% of the world’s population holds some type of spiritual belief, why wouldn’t we try to understand the human condition from both a physical and spiritual perspective. No matter what that path of spirituality is.

Why we hold onto the past is just as important as why we should let it go and make way for a better future. But it’s hard sometimes to get there from here. We become so used to the pattern of struggle and grief, that it can eventually be all we know. Letting go of that can be scary. But it does no one any good at all, to live in such a place of despair.

Learning to let go doesn’t mean you’re forgetting about the past. It simply means you’re not going to live in those long gone days any longer. It allows you to open the door to the light of the future and welcome in the change, the opportunities and the excitement of the unknown.

Read more about Dealing With Trials & Grief – Trials, Trauma & Grief – A Dissertation

But That Will Change How Others Respond To You

Everyone knows the adage “You can’t change others” or “You can’t learn lessons for others” when dealing with negative situations. Those wise old sayings come from centuries of experience passed down from one generation to the next. But it seems in our desire to be helpful and show compassion we have to be reminded of their message constantly. If you continue the same patterns of response, you are allowing others to control your emotions and direct your path. They don’t have to change you, because they have the ability to manipulate you through their own actions and your consistent patterns of response. They already know how you’re going to react, because you’ve done it so many times before. In doing so, you become an enabler and through your own actions, you promote the negative behavior you want changed in the first place.

This can occur in any type of relationship. It’s more often associated with relationships that are impacted by addiction. But it can also occur in work situations with a boss, or co-worker. Continue reading →